So I've been thinking about the advisory marks that will soon be sent to my parents. Okay, I know these marks barely have any weight or bearing on our final grades, but I do know they're called advisory marks for a reason. I'll admit, I failed my first math long test, and I'm pretty sure my physics exam results aren't so pretty, either. Unfortunately, for these two subjects, our teachers do not give graded quizzes nor homework, so the basis for the marks are the long exams.
Which means I'll be getting an F in both subjects. Crud. This has never happened to me...that, and I'm really scared of my dad. He does not care whether these marks have any bearing or not, the fact that the school sends them out and makes it seem official is the only thing that matters to him. I wish I could just focus like all the smarter people can. I wish I wasn't so eager to prove myself, so I would actually have time to sit down and study.
I wish my input wasn't so mediocre. Maybe I'd actually pass things that way. God, I feel so stupid in my course.
I'm also scared because I don't want my dad to think Judo's the problem. Judo has nothing to do with my academics. For my dad, every extra-curricular activity spells distraction. It's not. It's not Judo, it's ME. ME. ME. I love my team.
Kahit konting panahon ko lang nakasama ang team, sobrang mahal ko ang teammates
ko. Gusto ko ituloy 'to hanggang mag-graduate
ako, gusto kong panindigan ang sinimulan ko.
Gusto kong patunayan na kaya ko. I want to prove to my family, myself, and people in general, that I can do what I love and what I have to do at the same time.
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